Amazing Grace

I hope I am not alone in this world when I say the first thing I do when I wake up is reach for my iPhone and check email, Facebook and my "Words with Friends" games. Actually, I know I am not alone because my two sisters do this... but does it go outside the family?

This morning was a little different because 1) I didn't have to jump out of bed, bundle myself up, walk the dog, shower and go to work. Nope. I called in sick. I knew the stone I was dealing with the day before was about to come out (I'll spare the details, but I just knew). I had no clue how painful it was going to be on its exit, but let's just say I didn't even notice. Yet, there it was in the toilet. Not what I pictured, but being the "medical professional" that I am, I am super curious so I fished it out (don't ask how) and took a picture for your viewing pleasure (no, not the penny.. that's for size comparison!). How the heck can something so small cause so much pain? If that pain had produced a baby then I would at least feel justified in my pain!

But I digress, being still too early in the morning on a day off to start the day, I crawled back into my bed (still a little crampy, what the!?) and turned to my iPhone for company. I remembered I had Pandora on it so I opened it up and clicked on my "Christian" station. Oh wow, did I need to hear what came out of that phone. Chris Tomlin's "Amazing Grace (My Chains Are Gone) started and I just closed my eyes and sang along.

My chains are gone
I've been set free
My God, my Savior has ransomed me
And like a flood His mercy rains
Unending love, Amazing grace

Even if you aren't a Christian, we can all identify with this song in some way. We all have our chains that seem to be holding us back or in the same place. We are a creature of habit. We will keep doing the same thing over and over again and expect different results. But for someone like me, I have someone who has broken my chains and yet I still sit here and don't follow Him as I should. I'm thinking I just am not sure exactly how to go about it.

This leads me to what I will be doing for the next three months, starting February 1st. My friend, the one who shares some of my food-related struggles, told me about this wellness challenge called "Better Me in 3." I read over it and I'm pretty darn excited. This challenge can almost be whatever you want it to be for you, and as a Christian I love how the focus isn't just on food (or telling me what to eat), but is also on bettering myself in other areas of my life. I mean, if I am going to take the focus off food in my life then I need somewhere else to focus. I think this challenge is going to do this for me...and with a money prize involved?! That's like the cream cheese frosting on the amazing carrot cake from Rick's Dessert Diner. Ok, now I just started a craving... see? That's how easy it is for me!

I know this challenge is going to be difficult. It is most likely going to be very painful at moments. Please don't roll your eyes, but a really bad analogy occured to me: this process is going to be much like the stupid kidney stone. The pain was short-lived but excruciating. My nurse in the E.R. was the best one I could have ever hoped for and was so supportive of me. She let me cry. She let me cry out "Oh my God!" She sympathized with me the whole way. I knew I would survive, but there were moments I wasn't sure I could handle what I was going through. See the connection? For a girl who knows all about short-term sacrifice for long-term goals in all other areas of my life, food has been the difficult area. Perhaps because I've made it a sacrifice in the past? Perhaps...